Beacon Hill. (Chapter 1)

I love walking home at night. The easy word for the scene is charming, but it is the best one. The illuminated lamps, small streets, the brick sidewalks. I stopped wearing heels of any kind a long time ago, out of comfort and a strange desire to feel closer to the ground.

Journal. (Chapter 1)

I write to find my feelings. To relive them. To forget them. To accept them. To embrace them.

We are all patterns of contradiction, but isn't this what makes it fun? I don't want to figure it all out, I don't want to over think, I just want to have the best moments I can have and if that means changing directions and not making sense, why not? I want a life filled with opportunity and excitement, grounded by lessons that make me grow.

I love to give. To my family, to my friends.

Expectations. (Chapter 7)

I was excited to come to The Chronicle. A year later, I am bored. I have been relegated to assignments that do not excite me, I find myself wondering where else I could be. I go home each night, go to CT each weekend, but even these mini-escapes do not erase the boredom I suffer for exactly 37.4 hours each week (coffee breaks and emailing my friends make the rest at least tolerable).

Confusing. (Chapter 22)

I am no different. I would like to avoid disappointment, but I realize as much time as I spend thinking, I cannot predict everything. But wait, that doesn’t work. I have been through this cycle too many times; not again.

Honestly, there is just too much happening. I have overloaded myself again. How can I feel anything, when my day is spent avoiding complication? I cannot confront my feelings, as much as I want to. I have forgotten how to enjoy those simple moments, I am too busy worrying.

I have always had an idea of what I wanted. Who I wanted. And I have always managed to avoid becoming completely vulnerable. Right when I feel like this could change with him, I stop myself. Who is he? What does he want? He is so different than I am yet at the same time, he is so much like me.

The Date. (Chapter 12)

I am meeting him after work. I don't feel particularly sexy today, but I guess that doesn't matter, because that is probably not the way I want to look.

Extended Meetings. (Chapter 7)

Does he realize I don't believe he understands anything he is talking about? We just ran through this 2 hours ago as prep for this meeting. The team is listening to him review MY notes and MY strategy and no one here knows that this is all MY work. I left law because I thought I was walking away from meetings and moments like this, but I am beginning to realize these games are the same no matter where you work.

New York City. (Chapter 1)

I would like to believe that many people that find themselves here are like me. Trying to start over or find themselves. Among this city, its buildings, it promise and even its shortcomings. One place where 8 million souls are looking for something. Its inspiring or maybe its childish. But, I never have run away for believing in something, least a dream.